Self Esteem || 5 Steps I Take to Keep Social Media in Control

Happy Sunday!

So it has been a while since I have shared on here about positivity versus negativity, VERY long actually here is my first post on the topic. Social media and the affects comparison has on our self esteem is something that has been on my mind for a while now, and after all this time I am finally ready to share my two cents on it! I have been able to pack social media into a pretty little place in my day-to-day to-dos, and I thought that this may be helpful for someone else too.

Today I am sharing the 5 steps I take to keep social media in control and avoid getting sucked into the comparison game. Grab a cup a coffee and a cozy blanket, this one is long!

Studies That Prove the Negative Effects of Social Media on Young Adults

Just the other day my hubby and I got into a long conversation about social media and how bad it can be for the communities we live in. He was telling me about how there have been a few studies coming out, that basically think (well, its pretty confirmed), that social media works generally the same way as drugs do. That it provides “instant reward” / releases dopamine which creates addiction and ultimately then can lead towards depression. And depression and anxiety is such a common problem among teens and young adults these days, it is so sad! If you think about it, just 10 years ago this was not an issue and the amount of screen time the average young adult would have is so minimal and for some non existent. (The main study that he was referring to is here).

It is so easy to get sucked into the social media comparison game these days and it is so sad to me how many people are truly affected by it. Not to get all dark, but let us step back and take a look at the world we currently live in. Mass shootings, school shootings, terroristic threats, bullying leading to suicides…There is so much evil around us! I want to say that being a young adult these days is simply life threatening in itself, but to be truthful anyone at any age is in just as much danger.

The Comparison Game

Social media has made it very difficult to retain any amount of self confidence if you use it to compare yourself to others. (Which is easy to do.) It is littered with highlight reels and impossible truths bound to make anyone feel less then wonderful about themselves. These expectations we set for ourselves based off of the perfect Kylie Jenner body image, endless fashion wardrobes that any IT girl needs to have, or unrealistic lifestyles of lavish travel, VIP events, and exclusive parties; who can keep up with that?

As a mother I shudder to think of the stresses and emotional rollercoasters that are inevitable for my daughters. As much as I wish I could, I cannot protect them from it. But what I can do is raise them to hopefully have enough self love that they can build a shield to block out those negativities that surround us daily, and rise above the superficial. I am a grown woman, and even I find myself getting down because I start to compare myself to others. ‘Why should I post a picture of my living room decor when there are thousands of other living rooms on Instagram that blow my basic-ness out of the water’. ‘Or maybe I shouldn’t share this dress I love because I am SO pregnant and honestly it looked far better on those other girls, I will look silly!’.

Social Media is a Tool

But I take a step back and I remember, that the reason I share what I love and the reason I have my blog to begin with, is because I have a passion for writing and spreading positivity to others. It is important to remember that social media platforms are just tools, and that the affects it has on us is because of how we allow it to get to us. (See a great article here that shares this in more depth). That is why over the last few months I have really taken the time to put social media in more of a controlled and balanced place in my work life. I only use it as a tool, and I keep it as part of my everyday tasks in which I take the steps I need to do my job and then I put it away. I wanted to share that with you all whether you are a blogger, or just someone who uses social media to shop; there can be steps you can take to keep social media in check and never allow it to cloud your day-to-day life and happiness.

 

5 steps I take to keep social media in control and avoid getting sucked into the comparison game.

 

#1 Dedicate a certain amount of time to WORKING on social media, and when that time is up, STOP.

Instagram, and Pinterest are two of the social media platforms that I focus the majority of my attention on simply because they are the best for my niche. Using these platforms can be super beneficial to helping my brand grow, and it is one of the most important steps I take when I promote new content. I have started using both of these platforms for the exact reason I need to, and that is as a tool for my business. When I log onto these platforms I set a timer and go to work marketing my content and engaging for the purpose of networking organically. When the time is up I stop, and move on to the next thing. This has truly helped me focus on my goal, and discourages me from browsing aimlessly and ultimately getting sucked into a time warp.

#2 Share content on social media that is up-lifting and respond to everyone that I can.

When it is time to share my content on social media I make sure that it is always positive, uplifting, educational, or humorous. There is no point in sharing sadness or negativity, and I will never take part in that. I always want to make sure that I am encouraging inspiration, and lifting my followers up so that I can brighten their day and add value. I also always do my best to spend some time to respond to comments and DMs. It is important to me to let my friends and followers know that they do matter, and I am never too good to ignore someone who is taking the time to engage with me and show support.

#3 Engage on social media honestly and only because I WANT to, not because I think I have to.

We all know that the purpose of social media is to be social. Spending time each day engaging IS important if you want to grow and it you want to be a valued user on any given platform. You may have heard platforms like Instagram and Pinterest are actually penalizing users who do not engage organically because they want to encourage real organic social growth versus spam. I think this is wonderful! But it is easy to jump on your social platform and go crazy commenting and liking posts just to hopefully get the same in return. I make it a point to engage daily but only with content that inspires me and only when I feel I truly have something positive and beneficial to say. Otherwise I stay away from spamming for the sole purpose of personal gain. That is not healthy, and just not right.

#4 Take days off and completely unplug.

Every single week I take one day off of social media, sometimes two days! It is usually Saturday, and it is funny but if you pay attention you may notice that many people you follow also take the weekends off too. It is way to easy to feel obligated to keep up on social media every single day, and it is really unhealthy to feel the need to be plugged in constantly. I like to take a day or two every week to really let go of social media all together and fully focus on my family and the beautiful world around me. Just like a job, you wouldn’t take your job home with you and work all weekend long would you? Social media should get put away on the weekends too.

#5 Put my focus on my blog, because that is what really matters.

For bloggers it is easy to get caught up in the number game and to feel like your worth is based on how many followers you have on Instagram or how many likes you get on a particular photo. But we have to remember that if social media was to go away, what would we have left? I ultimately put the bulk of my focus on my blog and my blog alone. At the end of the day that is where my passion lies, that is what I love to do, and that is what really matters when is comes to my job. Yes I use social media as a tool to help my blog grow, but ultimately they are only tools and extensions of what my real brand is and that is LydiaLouise.com.

 

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